On Saturday we were supposed to be watching conference in the morning and then get a bit of a P-day the end of the day. But, what happened is with all the flooding happening up north in Bulacan (QC North mission now) we got asked (told) to participate in a service project at the area office of repacking rice. It was done in the downstairs parking garage and we took 50 kilo bags and repacked them into smaller bags so they could be shipped up north and handed out to those affected by the flooding. I didn’t go into it with the best attitude but I worked really hard hoping we could get it done pretty fast so we could go watch Conference. That was at 8 am. It didn’t end until 2 pm. haha So 6 hours of carrying 50 kilo bags around a garage and I was way tired. One thing that I thought about tho, was how it was better to be doing service rather than to be listening to the prophet talk about service. It really was a good experience and later as we did watch conference and they did talk about service it was a good feeling. It was hard work tho, we were all soaked in sweat and the burlap of the bags did havoc on my hands and fingers, but that was ok because we got to watch the Saturday sessions (except priesthood) that evening and then Sunday we watched it at the stake center (where the mission office is) and we had 4 investigators come! It was pretty sweet plus a less active guy that came too. I got to see members from the QC 2nd ward there too, which was cool. Then back to the mission home for the last session and priesthood.
Priesthood was an amazing session. One talk that hit me really hard was the one by President Eyring, I wrote down more and maybe learned more from other talks but I didn’t feel the spirit as strong as I felt it in that one. (and I felt it pretty strong a few times). I had fasted last week to be able to receive a little revelation about how to do this training thing, how to do it the way the Lord wants and give it my all. That talk was the answer to my prayers and fast. Just a few minutes in to the talk it just hit me so hard and it was almost like a voice told me "this one is for you". There's always those certain messages that just seem to be made to our situation at that certain time and it’s how I know those men are inspired of God and that they speak to all of us because He loves us and they love us. I know He loves me and he is totally aware of my situation. It was what I needed. I wish I could re-watch it over and over because that is when the good feelings kind of ended. Right after I got slapped in the face with how I’ve got to do more than just listen and feel the Spirit from those talks. Now is the time to apply it and actually use it.
Anyways just been a tough week, it’s been fun too. We had Zone leader council on Wednesday and the Mindoro Zone Leader's hung out with us the whole day and it was well needed, really loosened me up. I’ve gotten in some good study when I’ve found the time. The scriptures are amazing and they get you thru the day. Maybe that is a big reason why I’m struggling today- no scriptures, especially after the spiritual feast the past 2 days (withdrawals haha). I also woke up feeling pretty sick and just not good, just basically tired. Today is our "p-day" but not really, just given time by president to buy some groceries.
I just feel like time is moving way too fast. Then you add into that this week was my year mark and I just feel like a crappy missionary, like I’m not smart enough, mature enough, or magaling enough to be a missionary that’s halfway done. It’s just been hard having my first junior companion and yet not really feeling like the senior at the same time. We need a bit of independence from the assistants or we're both going to go crazy. We'll see if it’s possible and if not, we'll both half to suck it up I guess.
The biggest thing I learned from President Eyring's talk was how he said we must make those "junior companions" feel that we need their help. I’ve got to try it, even just sharing about how I’m struggling and just asking for his help and support, like president told me this week, communication is big. I’ve been keeping stuff inside for a long time and it really isn’t helping. I’ve just got to be open and trust the other person and ask for that help.
I know this church is true. It’s when you go to where you can’t go anymore and then you keep going that you fulfill your potential as a servant of God. I know that’s true and I just got to live it,110 percent.
Love you all! Thanks for all the love and support
love
Elder Stover
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